Recalculating…

Walking around the quiet streets of the city, passing by all the closed restaurants, bars and many businesses that would usually be packed this time of year, there’s a sense of stillness and calm that ironically hasn’t been translating into an inner sense of peace or calm. And I’ve found limiting physical travels actually increases experiences of movement at times – to the point of getting motion sickness just from the trips my agitated mind likes to take.

Or perhaps my view and experience of motion has shifted since doing a movement retreat with a wonderful group at the DCC this summer. I now find myself armed with a helpless curiosity about what is actually guiding and giving purpose to movement. What compass are we relying on and more importantly what brings the workings of that compass into evidence? Timing couldn’t be better for this query as daily events in these strange times are perpetual and reliable reminders of uncertainty and impermanence. Yet in order to remedy these facts, I catch myself countless times investing much energy and going great distances to finally end up where I started: having to accept these unchangeable truths, for another short while.

I feel incredibly fortunate to have had the opportunity to spend time at the DCC this summer because for me no other place has shined a brighter light on the mechanics of that inner compass. What privilege to be able, for some time, to put  away all things that give our energy and movement a straightforward purpose: jobs, plans, to-do lists and habitual activities. To make space for exploration in an environment where we can feel safe, supported and well-nourished not only by the beauty of nature around us but by the exceptional care of the staff which included  delicious food and attention to details for everyone’s individual needs. 

It explains why the frequent drives from Montreal to Kinmount this summer never felt long, even if on certain occasions, it was only to spend a weekend at the DC. Helping work on restoring the monuments, meeting members of the amazing community, learning about the history and receiving teachings on the monuments and what they represent was an experience I deeply cherish. 

I’m now back to a busy work schedule and workdays feeling like a race around a circular track. I hope to keep the thread of exploration of what is moving us to go, as I wish for all to have the opportunity to explore and the good fortune to have access to a supportive space like the DCC with its wonderful teachers and community. Freedom in each moment seems to be dependent on it, allowing for our compass to continually recalculate and recalibrate to the ever-changing world around us.

Hagop Alanjian